Building Motivational Interviewing Skills

By Dr. Kate Watson

Whether you're a healthcare provider, therapist, victim advocate, social worker, or simply someone who supports people during difficult times, Motivational Interviewing (MI) offers a compassionate, evidence-based way to help others make meaningful changes in their lives—without pushing, pressuring, or persuading.

But here’s the catch: MI is simple in concept and challenging in practice. Like learning to play an instrument or speak a new language, it takes time, feedback, and intentional effort. So, how can you learn MI and start using it effectively?

Let’s break it down.

Step 1: Understand the Spirit of MI

Before memorizing techniques or scripts, start with the spirit of Motivational Interviewing. MI is not a trick to get people to do what you want—it’s a respectful, collaborative way of helping people explore and resolve ambivalence about change.

The core elements of MI's spirit can be remembered with the acronym PACE:

  • Partnership – You’re a teammate, not the expert taking control.

  • Acceptance – You honor the person’s autonomy and strengths.

  • Compassion – You have their best interest at heart.

  • Evocation – You draw out their own reasons and motivation for change.

Step 2: Learn the Core Skills (OARS)

The basic MI skill set is known as OARS, and these tools help structure your conversations:

  • Open-ended questions – Invite reflection and depth (“What’s important to you about that?”)

  • Affirmations – Recognize strengths and efforts (“It’s clear you care about your kids.”)

  • Reflections – Mirror back thoughts and feelings (“You’re unsure if this will work, but curious.”)

  • Summaries – Tie things together and create momentum (“So what I’m hearing is…”)

You can start practicing these in everyday conversations. Try reflecting instead of offering advice. Ask open questions instead of jumping in with answers.

Step 3: Take a Training (Or a Few!)

Motivational Interviewing is best learned with real-time feedback. Consider starting with an introductory workshop, then advancing with more focused training. Some training resources include:

  • Motivational Interviewing Network of Trainers (MINT) – A great place to find certified trainers and events.

  • Online courses – Thinkific, Coursera, or university-affiliated programs often offer self-paced or live options.

  • BooksMotivational Interviewing: Helping People Change and Grow (Miller & Rollnick, 2024) is the go-to manual.

Bonus tip: Look for training that includes roleplay practice and coaching feedback. That’s where the growth happens.

Step 4: Practice with Purpose

MI is a skill—and like any skill, it improves with intentional repetition. Here’s how to keep growing:

  • Find a practice buddy – Set up regular roleplays to build fluency.

  • Record and review your sessions (with permission, of course)—listen for your own use of OARS and change talk.

  • Use cheat sheets – Keep a list of good open-ended questions or common reflections nearby.

  • Set small goals – Try using one new MI skill each day, like more reflections or fewer unsolicited suggestions.

Step 5: Get Feedback and Coaching

Working with an MI coach is one of the most effective ways to develop. Coaches can help you:

  • Recognize patterns in your conversations

  • Increase the depth of your reflections

  • Notice when you’re drifting into “righting reflex” (giving advice too quickly)

  • Fine-tune your tone and timing

If coaching isn’t available, consider joining peer consultation groups or recording sessions to self-assess.

Step 6: Embrace the Growth Curve

MI can feel awkward at first—especially if you’re used to giving advice or solving problems for people. But stick with it. With time, MI becomes less like a technique and more like a natural, respectful way of being with people.

You’ll likely notice that:

  • People feel more heard

  • Conversations feel less like battles and more like discoveries

  • Clients or loved ones start coming up with their own plans

Final Thoughts

Motivational Interviewing isn’t about fixing people—it’s about walking alongside them while they discover their own reasons for change. That’s powerful, and frankly, quite beautiful.

So, whether you’re just getting started or sharpening your existing skills, remember: every reflective question, every pause, and every affirming statement is a step toward better connection—and that’s where real change begins.

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